[stacey_michelle]

Im confused all my planning yet i dont know the basics

Do you have a civil ceremony in a church, or is that just for Hotels etc?? And what goes into one?

And with religious ceremonies how religious does it have to be?

I know i sound reallllly stupid.

You can tell ive been planning the most important things...

Stacey xxx

[Demon Diva]

With a religious ceremony, it will, of course, focus on religion. God is mentioned throughout most of the ceremony and particularly in the vows. (I can send you a copy of the service, if you like?) Unless you go Unitarian, which is far more flexible. You cannot have a civil ceremony in any place of religious worship - if you think about it, it's a total contradiction - but lots of very nice places such as castles, stately homes, and posh hotels are now licensed for civil ceremonies.

(Actually, my favourite venues - http://www.swinfenhallhotel.co.uk and http://www.newsteadabbey.org.uk are both civil venues, and I'd definitely have chosen one of those if it wasn't for the fact that H2B and I feel very strongly that as Christians we should marry in church - the two stately homes are so much prettier!)

[Curly Lisa]

A civil ceremony is none religious so won't be done in a church.

For a church service I think it'll depend on the vicar on how religious it has to be. The service will be religious and will contain hymns, but I think some will let you have non religious readings as long as you have one religious one.

To get married in church you both have to be christened.

[Mrs justsarah]

Hi Stacey
With a civil ceremony you are not allowed any religious content,although some venues/registrars may allow ceratin song lyrics,like Robbie Williamd,Angels
They are conducted in any venue with a civil ceremony licence ,or registry office,they are also over very quickly,although you can have readings to make them last a little longer.
I myslef am having a civil ceremony at our venue as neither myself or h2b are religious

[DrSunflower]

With a religious ceremony, it will, of course, focus on religion. God is mentioned throughout most of the ceremony and particularly in the vows. (I can send you a copy of the service, if you like?) Unless you go Unitarian, which is far more flexible.

If you do go Unitarian, you can have pretty much any sort of service that you like, assuming that the minister agrees that what you want is a good fit for you as a couple. My minister has done a lot of inter-faith weddings (Christian/Hindu/Buddhist/Muslim) and also one pagan wedding, and one wedding of two total non-believers! Their services are usually very similar to a CofE wedding, but they like to make each service individual to the couple.

We're not having God mentioned in our vows, and all the references to God will be open-ended and will specifically welcome non-Christian views (including atheist views) on what God is. It's important to us that our open-ended, spiritual views are represented in the service, and that people of all beliefs will feel included.

The down side is that there aren't many Unitarian chapels around, but the one we've chosen is gorgeous. No silly rules about being part of the parish, either, and he doesn't even enforce attendance before the wedding (which somehow makes us want to go!)